My name is Myrtle Schmergle and I'm originally from New York City where I worked as a professional exotic dancer. One day a very attractive gentleman came into the club while I was onstage dancing. He came over to the stage, gave me a $100.00 bill, and told me I was going to be contacted by an extraterrestrial, and then left the club. I got very excited because I thought I was going to be hired to dance on a spaceship, which would really prepare me for auditioning in Las Vegas.

Well, nothing happened until the following week. I was at home in my bathroom hand-washing one of my g-strings and suddenly out of nowhere, Godess Galactica stepped out of my bathtub. I was a little taken aback but very impressed by her outfit. I said to her, "Oh you must be the extraterrestrial who wants me for the dancing gig!" She said, "Since you already dance in the happy vibe, the fun vibe, the light vibe, the love vibe, if you will be my earth contactee and earth reporter for my live broadcasts, you will then dance multidimensionally!"

Who can top that on a resume? So here I am, Myrtle Schmergle Earth Reporter for Godess Galactica!